Where is your Spiritual Trajectory taking You??
There is a trajectory, or perhaps a velocity, to our spiritual journey. No, it is not a race. But if your life isn’t changing, I mean evolving, then you are stuck in a karmic concrete of sorts.
The only constant in life is change. ~ Heraclitus
My life was slowly getting pinched off. It was collapsing in on me. In other words, my choices, that I preferred and thus chose … that arena of choices was getting smaller and smaller. I was shutting myself down in a way. Right before I got cracked open, with an unexpected release of emotions, I was boxing myself in regarding my subconscious emotions. In hindsight, it was really a mental karmic stigma.
If I were to rate my spiritual trajectory, or perhaps my spiritual velocity back then, I was coming to a stop. A dead stop. My life was collapsing into a smaller and smaller set of choices. I wasn’t about to confront an emotional stigma, that I had no idea was running my life. I had no idea that an emotion, stored in my subconscious, was strongarming my life into what would soon be a standstill. Thank God I got cracked open by the cosmic two-by-four.
How can you tell if you have been sleepwalking? How can you tell if you are getting up, in the middle of the night, sound asleep, and walking about your home? Well, you might sprinkle flour on your floors, and look for footprints in the morning.
How can you tell if you are posturing with subconscious emotions? You could take inventory of the emotions that you allow yourself to feel. What emotions make you cringe, when you feel them stirred? What emotions are completely off the table? What emotions are received by hostile responses in your family dynamics? You could review your family of origin, and take note of the emotions that were OK to show, and also the emotions that were discouraged, or strongly discouraged. You could even take it back a generation. If it is known to you, look at the family dynamics of your parents. And perhaps, if applicable, the emotional dynamics of your spouse’s parents. We subconsciously pick partners that mirror our same karmic disposition. Look for the emotional patterns.
Then there are emotions that are too broad to inventory. Where you loaded up your psyche with a whole collage of emotions. An example of this would be PTSD. Where you, perhaps as a soldier thrust into the horrors of battle, have gone into shock, in an extremely violent and deadly scenario. Pushing the whole experience(s) into your subconscious. With far too many emotions to inventory them.
OK, sure. You have your life in order. You have worked out an acceptable, perhaps even fun, and enjoyable lifestyle. Sure thing. There are no requirements. We are given free will. Fierce free will. You don’t HAVE TO do anything. But if you are reading this blog, then perhaps you are on a spiritual journey of sorts. Where you are bumping up against the karmic stigmas you have accumulated in your subconscious.
It is not uncommon for folks, who are on their spiritual journey, to plateau or stall. They have read all the books, and have daily practices that they engage in. Yet, their karmic demeanor doesn’t really change that much. They are metaphorically stuck in a karmic concrete of sorts.
Play around with your emotions. Perhaps while you are driving around alone, let yourself feel some uncommon feelings. Do you ever let yourself get mad or angry? If not, play with that. What would get you mad? Think about topics found in our media these days. If something doesn’t trigger any emotions in you … well, maybe emotionally you are already halfway dead. Our society is pushing many emotional buttons, or triggers, in millions of people.
Another arena we can search for suppressed emotions we are not consciously aware of … is the movies. Pay attention to your feelings, and as you watch a movie, see if you can detect any very subtle reactions. Often we suppress our emotions well before we ever actually feel them. I never felt anger. Not consciously. Yet anger was strongarming my whole life.
If you do have subconscious posturing habits with emotions, sooner or later, the cosmic two-by-four just might crack your life open. And if that happens, a whole new life will present itself, after the turbulence clears. But hey, why wait?