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family of origin

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What do You Value?

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What do You Value? It is a choice. Oftentimes, it might seem like our values are some kind of static thing. That shouldn’t be tampered with. I mean, values are important. Right? But yet, we all have different values. Sometimes completely different values. So, which ones are “right?” And thus, which ones are “wrong”? Is there a fundamental measuring stick that we can use, and know if we are in the right? Going back to where we get our values, we could look at our family of origin. The programming of our egos, if you will. If your were born on a farm, your family values might be … to be reliable. To have a strong work ethic. To be responsible. It wouldn’t work too well if you decided you didn’t want to water the crops or feed the livestock. Those values would be fundamental to the success of the…

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Out with the Old … In with the New

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Out with the Old … In with the New Shifting into the New Year The winds of change are upon us. Nobody has to be told that the world is changing. Humanity is going  though more change(s) than perhaps any time in our history. And here we are. So, what’s it going to be? There is a bit of an opportunity here. If, metaphorically, everything has been turned on its head, then you too can completely redesign yourself. (You always can.) But the notion I want to look at closer is your authentic preferences. You really didn’t have an ego, to speak of, the day you were born. No sentencing, no preferences, per se. And it was in your family of origin that your ego was created. Your ego, by its very nature, is a creature of habits or patterns. You could say we installed a groundwork of habits and…

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Forgiveness … giving up all hope for a better past

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Forgiveness … giving up all hope for a better past Set yourself free We could call this the self-love blog. Forgiveness is a powerful tool to restore your ability to love yourself. But let’s start with those people in our lives that we haven’t forgiven. Perhaps there are several. Are there people in your past that you feel may have taken malice out on you? Perhaps it was your parents? Or perhaps you are very angry toward someone who has unexpectedly left you? Ether personally, or perhaps they passed away without saying goodbye? Perhaps they left you holding the bag? Or perhaps your lover cheated on you? Or you cheated on your spouse? Or … or … or … For myself, I have had to forgive several people in my life. Well, I didn’t have to forgive them. But in truth, it would just be a matter of time before I got…

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